We sat down with a dear friend, Mish Walkeden, founder of creative agency Lupine and studio gallery Lupine Studio, to hear more about her perspective on life, navigating loss, and what it’s like to be on the precipice of entering a new chapter - motherhood.
7 minute read
Carly: Good morning Mish!
Mish: Hello Carls!
Carly: How’s your day starting out today?
Mish: Very well, I’ve been walking down at Point Roadknight with my dog Lottie and now enjoying a cacao, so all in all it’s been a vibrant morning.
Carly: Sounds like a beautiful morning. I’m really looking forward to our conversation today, Mish. I felt it might be interesting to hear from you because your way of being, both personally and professionally, is nothing short of inspiring. I’d love to begin with something you’ve shared with me: the idea that anything is possible. From my perceptive, it’s an idea you seem to live by. Talk us through what this means.
Mish: Thanks for your kind words Carls and what a potent place to start - a question I've never pondered and an interesting observation…
If I wind it back — from a young age, I was always reaching for the edges of what was possible in my small world. Even as a 5-, 6-, or 7-year-old, I was curious and eager to learn from those around me, especially adults or older kids. I was forever planning my escape and trying to stretch beyond what was available to me or ‘appropriate’ for my age. I spent a lot of my childhood trying on new versions of myself — as the dance lead, the horse rider, the basketballer, the shop owner, the poet, the singer. I tried it all, and my parents always supported me and made me feel like they took me seriously in all of my endeavors, planting an early belief for me that anything is possible.
So, to answer the question — the world told me early on that I could dream big and that things would mostly work out in life, and when they didn’t, then that was okay because I could find the tools and the gumption to move from lily pad to lily pad until I found myself where I needed to be. For the most part, that belief has served me well. But at times, it’s also tipped into blind naivety — landing me in hot water a few times, occasionally blowing up my life in the process.
Carly: I love the way you describe both the expansive side of that belief and the moments when it humbled you. It sounds like this idea of possibility is about optimism, but also about resilience and resourcefulness… knowing you can meet what comes, even when it’s not easy.
Mish: Yes, I think so. By subconsciously applying this belief to all things in life — love, work, creativity, relationships, intimacy, grief, spirituality — it’s pushed me to find new possibilities within myself, to shed old skins and keep letting life unfold in all the beauty and the pain.
In more recent moments, it’s been particularly valuable in times of hardship or transition to broaden the lens and really feel safe in the comfort of knowing anything is possible — that things do change and swing round to the positive again, with the right amount of patience. And when things feel hard, knowing that almost all of what ails you can be corrected in the mind.
Carly: The way you describe finding new possibilities within yourself sounds like creativity in motion, like you’re constantly reshaping and responding to what life brings. To take this a bit deeper, I wonder how creativity shows up for you day-to-day, both in your work and beyond it? What does it mean to you to live a creative life?
Mish: My creativity exists in a soup of all the things I enjoy — it’s somewhat undefined at this point. There’s little separation between my creativity, work, community, friendships, passion, what I eat, physicality or spirituality.
At times, I’ve felt it could be wise to create more separation. I have brief moments of wondering what it might be like to have a clear understanding of what is work, what is creativity, and what is strictly friendship or passion. But I like the fluidity of being able to combine them all — to collaborate, and see how all things can lift and mutually create opportunity for each other.
Ultimately, I feel very lucky to lean into each day and let my creativity and intuition guide me.
Carly: I can hear how you so naturally allow all the parts of your life to inform and enrich each other, rather than keeping them separate. What have you found most surprising about this stage of life—emotionally, mentally, physically? Relationally?
Mish: Well, a big surprise this year was falling pregnant! My partner Sam and I were in India living a very footloose and fancy free life when we found out, and although I’m sure we both did the birds and the bees talk at some stage in our lives — it caught us both by surprise. I’d never dreamed of having my own children; I was open to the idea but also trusting if that wasn't what life had planned for me.
Falling pregnant, starting a family, and being at the doorstep of parenthood has totally swept me up and opened my heart, mind, body, and spirit in ways I never imagined possible — it’s been all-encompassing and full of daily surprises.
Some context, and a prelude to that surprise, was a surprise deep down the other end of the spectrum — only six months earlier I had a freak happening in my family where my dad, my grandfather, and my uncle all passed away unexpectedly within ten days of each other. A big portion of the masculine line that raised me disappeared. This moment in life surprised me in many ways.
Carly: What a huge year it’s been for you Mish, one marked by both deep loss and profound creation. The passing of your dad, grandfather and uncle, alongside the conception of new life, what a significant contrast. What was that like for you, navigating all of that complexity?
Mish: Well, I guess when you think of the time when someone you love is passing, you kind of hope that it will be all angels and harps and everyone sitting around their death bed hugging and singing ‘kumbaya’. At least something remotely similar.
The more accurate truth is that that week or so felt like a long, drawn-out scene in a Tarantino film — it moved slowly, was chaotic, and too uncomfortable to believe. You kind of expect life to stop with you, to wait for you to catch a breath and reconcile what happened, but it keeps going on — everyday life kept happening with seemingly no understanding of the gravity of what had just transpired. Peppered through the sadness, there were also some comically inappropriate moments, and others you just had to laugh at.
I could write extensively about how paradoxical that time was, but I guess what I’ll say is that I felt like I was, and still am more or less, accepting of death, even a little curious about what happens on the other side. I believe in nature and see evidence everywhere that death is a part of life, but I was totally blindsided by the process of grief. I didn't know that it stalled your mind and stuck in your body — that it stole your memory and keeps you in bed all day. I also didn’t know that it can bring you into contact with the incredible intricacies of life so meaningfully — that it enables you to experience everything at once and truly explore how expansive it is to feel.
I had many days and nights walking in the park or forest, crying with the sun or moon on my face — totally open — and to be honest, those were some of the most powerfully raw moments I’ve experienced in this lifetime. I really believe at the basin of grief is love, and when you surrender, there’s a gold torus field waiting to sweep you back up into the meaning of life — the potent medicine lives here, just beyond what you think you can’t handle.
So in summary, this moment in life has been all the things. To land so abruptly in the grief portal, only to be swept up into having a baby and literally growing life in my tummy only a few months later, has been all-encompassing — it’s impacted my heart in a big way, and I feel so lucky to receive it all.
Carly: What a powerful and insightful reflection, Mish. The way you speak about grief and love sitting side-by-side, the depth of feeling that’s come with it, and how grief brings us into contact with our aliveness, with our ability to feel. How has this chapter of pregnancy shifted your relationship with control and surrender?
Mish: Oh a good question. I think I’m at the midst of an intricate dance in my relationship with control and surrender, there’s a big re-learning that’s taken place for me in the last 5 years or so - a few different life experiences helped me to really see that I had a tendency to hold, to fix, to control - beyond what was healthy - and ultimately by letting go of all that wasn't serving me anymore created space for newness to drop in and be in a more aligned frame of life.
And then falling pregnant was just a double down on that, I noticed almost immediately that I had changed. Things feel very clear, I guess there's a primal activation that happens and all of a sudden you’re asking different questions, my priorities shifted and I was making decisions from a different place. It’s been a huge process of letting go and re-assessment of life that’s required me to press pause on many things that are very important to me - passion projects, personal desires, work momentarily and even some relationships have taken on new shapes. It’s important to me to be a good mother and partner, so I’m in a deep state of surrendering to all that I cannot hold anymore and trusting that what leaves fully is supposed to, and what is valuable will hold space. I imagine my relationship with control and surrender will be ever changing and no doubt tested as family, life, passion and personal needs change. It’s an evolving piece.
Carly: And how has your understanding of productivity or output shifted as your body has slowed down or asked for more rest?
Mish: This has probably been the most difficult area of adjustment for me. Coming together with Sam — even before we fell pregnant — really highlighted how much I was tending to in work, relationships, passion projects and so on. I had always felt inspired and excited to have a few plates spinning but when it was time to start designing our life together, I realised there were too many things that I was holding.
We often joke that Sam lives his life like a pomodoro pasta — clean, simple, paired back, rich in flavour — and mine has resembled more of a croquembouche, to which I’m always adding new profiteroles. Neither is right or wrong, but I see the value in prioritising spaciousness, and this season has required more exactly that, so I’m working on dismantling the croquembouche a little and meeting halfway. It’s been a valuable mirror to look into.
My output during pregnancy has been set by my body and ultimately, my capacity changing. I’m 39 weeks pregnant at the moment and can’t walk up the stairs without my knees hitting my tummy, and I need to nap daily or my mind becomes foggy so naturally, I’ve just had less capacity and therefore less output. I still have a little work to do in finding my healthy default state, I’m usually fully offline and inward - in solitude - or of the world and seeking every opportunity - so I’m working on having more than two speeds.
Carly: Haha I love that metaphor of being like pomodoro pasta and croquembouche…knowing you both, it makes so much sense! Are there any values or intentions you’re carrying into this next chapter?
Mish: There’s so much I want to carry into the next season; however, I’m trying to stay flexible and gentle with myself, knowing that I’m heading into a big period of change. Parenthood seems like a minefield of joy, love and happiness but also mistakes, forgiveness, re-learning, growing, and improving. I think compassion—for myself and others—will be valuable in this moment, along with patience. Lots of patience.
As for values, I think they’re easy to describe in words, but much harder to live by when life gets bumpy or when you’re operating from a blind spot. I see values less as a set of rules and more as an aligned feeling within yourself and in your interactions with the world around you. That feeling of alignment is incredibly powerful — it underpins everything you think, say, and do. It shapes what you attract and ultimately will drive your outcomes in life.
I’ve experienced both sides of this: moments when I felt deeply aligned with my values, which feels so good, and moments when I wasn’t — when I could or should have handled things better, for both others and myself. I try to make those misaligned moments meaningful by learning from them and continuing to develop my inner compass. So this next chapter and every chapter after that, is just a deepening of the person I want to be - less blind spots, more wisdom.
Carly: Isn’t that so true, that values can be easy to put into words yet far more difficult to embody. Living a life that feels aligned is a beautiful internal compass to live by. What’s been most grounding for you as you approach this transition?
Mish: Cooking has been my most constant grounding practice, even since I was a child - it’s my love language and how I down regulate - for me it’s the cornerstone of the home. Aside from cooking, I’ve been grounding by taking in the small things like just being at home, taking it slow, moving my body or being with friends…and being in nature.
We moved to the coast this year and it’s been so nice. Every morning we head to the beach or the bush and just take in mother-nature’s show. We’ve got a really special group of friends here too, so I feel like we are exactly where we’re supposed to be.
Carly: How has your relationship with your body shifted throughout pregnancy?
Mish: My relationship to my body has shifted immensely, I feel a bit naive to say this, but I really had no idea how incredible the female body is - and I’ve enjoyed the body transformation of being pregnant so much more than I thought I would. I feel so in awe of women and birthing people and what they go through - being pregnant has brought me into contact with myself and nature in a way that I haven't experienced before.
Developing a new lens for my body, also meant I had to shed my old lens, which sadly highlighted how sexualised the woman+ body is in society, and how deeply ingrained patriarchal oppression had impacted me, even in my own body. I had a view of my body, that wasn't mine or even accurate. It took me by surprise and at times, made me really sad to see how deep the conditioning was. It’s been empowering to re-write a more accurate adoration and weave in a new understanding of life, nature, body and birth.
Carly: What a powerful reflection, Mish. The way you describe shedding that old lens and coming into a truer relationship with your body sounds liberating. It’s striking how pregnancy seems to have connected you even more deeply not just to your own body, but to the intelligence of nature itself, and the lineage of women who’ve come before. What practices or moments have helped you feel most grounded or at home in your body lately?
Mish: My practice has been pretty inconsistent to be honest, on a daily basis - walking, visualisation and moments of meditation... but the truth is, this baby and my body is setting the tone at the moment. Some days I feel sick, sore or wake up tired. Other days I am bright and inspired, so I’ve been letting these moments guide me - fretting about not meditating daily like I used to feels counterunitive, so I'm just flowing at the moment, knowing it will all come back to me soon.
Carly: I can hear the state of surrender that you’re in, once again, so inspiring. If you could give your pre-pregnancy self one piece of advice, what would it be?
Mish: Hmmm, there’s lots of practical things that could have made this journey ‘easier’ but I trust the process and that’s what has transpired is all important. I feel like the timing is right - I’m grateful and content with all the moments and life experiences I’ve had up until this point. I think everything has happened as it was supposed to.
Carly: Trust the process…beautiful. And a final question for you: are there any books, films, or podcasts you’ve found particularly helpful or supportive for your journey into motherhood?
Mish: My beautiful friend Han leant me 10 Moons: The Inner Journey Of Pregnancy by Jane Harwicke Collings, which is such an important re-framing of birth and just a beautiful Australian book.
I also really enjoyed Rhea Dempsey’s Birth With Confidence, which is pretty straight up, but I’ve found that to be helpful for me personally.
The First 40 Days is a nice guide for recovery and we’ve been getting into the Aware Parenting books and podcasts which feels really supportive.
Books have been wonderful, but the biggest support has been from the community around us.
Georgia and the girls at Bodyworks have been pivotal in sharing their wisdom and guiding me both physically and in all other areas throughout this pregnancy.
Romy from Birth Space is a wealth of knowledge and has a range of diverse, inclusive birth classes.
Annita from Innate Birth is a wonderful, empowering midwife.
Rowie Cooke - doula, offers incredible birth and post-partum doula support.
Sam and I did a private Base Meditation course with just the two of us in the lead up to parenthood, and I feel like it’s been a valuable tool to both connect in the space of mediation, as well as both have a tool to carry with us into this next chapter.
And our friends and family have shown up in ways we couldn't imagine.
Carly: Some phenomenal recommendations and resources right there. Thank you so much for your time today Mish, your responses have been so insightful and full of wisdom (as usual).
Mish: You’re so welcome Carls, thank you for giving me the opportunity to share!